Monday, January 08, 2007

Diary of the Germs from a Sick Girl

OurDad is a Microbiologist, and a bit of a germ freak. Think Howard Hughes without the money, pilot's license or starlets. He had the BoyChild spraying the whole house with Lysol this weekend, and he wouldn't come near me. What does the word "quarintine" mean?

GreatMom took care of me, that is if starving me on a strictly pediapops diet, and persistently asking me, "Which end?" denotes care. "Which end," I'd rather not say.

Whenever anyone gets sick at our house OurDad activates the Family Emergency Action Plan section 5 and elevates the Microbial Alert to condition Red. A condition red automatically activates the Microbial Eradication plan. This basically means three cans of Lysol are used to fumigate the house and another is sprayed onto every possible surface. I don't think it worked this time. OurDad wasn't looking so good this morning. Perhaps he was dreading another semester at the old cc as he trudged out the door to his first day of classes, but I'm think his antiseptic aptitude failed him and he caught my germs. Sorry Dad. I hope he can look at this not as a failure of his microbial expertise, but as a measure of his dedication to students.

I wonder if he had an in-class gastrointestinal demonstration.

9 comments:

SourDad said...

I certainly had the grumbly tumbly Sunday and today on the first day of class. Thanks GirlChild. I did not, however, present my students with and in-class demonstration of microbial disorders from either end, but I did give them fair warning. “If I suddenly duck into the prep room class is dismissed.” I think they were pulling for me, and today I was glad to disappoint them.

Nothing like a green face to make a good impression on a new crop of students.

Miranda said...

Would the Lysol Treatment help if you slept with the infected child last night? Hypothetically, of course.

SourDad said...

In my professional opinion technically I would say, no, but basically-- You're fucked.

Miranda said...

One would think I would be used to that state of existence by now....

SourDad said...

See part 2. She'd sick again. So much for all that Lysol. I just hope it's not strep.

BTY she's sleeping in my bed. Germs, oh the horrors.

Miranda said...

Apparently, it's not just the germs going around. Hypothetically, of course.

My little culture of opportunistic pathogens better not be on my pillow right now since I am headed there in like three minutes.

I'll keep my fingers crossed that all is well in your household if you'll keep your fingers crossed that no one will be sick in mine tomorrow.

SourDad said...

Deal!

SourDad said...

Not that it will do any more than the damn Lysol.

Miranda said...

Faith based healing - not just for fundies.